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Mere Mortals
May 20, 2008
I had a 40-Year old in my office today who I diagnosed with heart disease fairly recently. He is 5 years my junior and is no higher risk for heart disease than I am. In discussing his diagnosis, he commented to me that the hardest thing for him was to think about his young son living without a father.
It is hard not to be affected by that kind of thing.
For some reason I have been aware of death more recently. I hear about earthquakes in China and cyclones in Myanmar and it strikes me that each of the myriad of dead are individuals just like me. Each one is a consciousness, a person with family and friends, a vital body that is now forever quieted.
This is not an obsessive thought, but neither is it one that I am not shunning. It does good to think about this kind of thing from time to time. It is not morbid. It is reality.
We all tend to live our lives as if we are the exception to the rule. How often do we drive by cemeteries without contemplating that our time here is short? How many opportunities to do good do we miss, thinking that we will have other chances in the future? How many relationships are put on hold so that we can accomplish things that have little real importance? How much self-indulgence to we throw ourselves at to escape the hard facts about life?
Studies have recently shown that people who have a history of cancer do not necessarily lead any more healthy of a lifestyle than those who don’t. We doctors don’t live healthier lives than our patients. Knowledge does not equal change. Experience does not equal wisdom. Our memories are short. Denial and escape are two of the most dominant forces in the human psyche. We are Human, all too human.
That is why I don’t shy away from moments like this. It is good see life as it really is. It is good to have reality tap you on the shoulder. It is good to be reminded to live today for today. Don’t dwell too much on tomorrow. Don’t grieve too much for yesterday. Today is what we have in front of us and is our opportunity to really live. Chances are very good that soon the blanket of escape and denial will once more shroud my consciousness, so while I am so reminded, I must Carpe Diem.
(5 votes, average: 5 out of 5)
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May 20th, 2008 at 1:36 pm
Beautiful post.
May 20th, 2008 at 2:31 pm
Thank you for that reminder. I definitely needed it.
May 20th, 2008 at 7:00 pm
Have you been reading The Last Lecture by Randy Pausch? Similar points of views that you mentioned just now in this blog
May 20th, 2008 at 11:29 pm
Well said.
May 21st, 2008 at 5:08 am
Loved this.
May 21st, 2008 at 6:41 am
Touching post, Dr. Rob. Thanks for sharing.
May 21st, 2008 at 3:24 pm
Now that I’m all cheered up I guess I’ll go Carpe Napae. (Canadian: “Grab a nap aye?”)
May 21st, 2008 at 5:34 pm
Nice.
May 22nd, 2008 at 3:36 pm
I have said this before to people, but I think it needs repeating.
Live for today, enjoy every minute of your life. And family, the most important thing in your life. No one laying on their death bed ever wished that they had made more money, that they had been more successful in busniess, but all wish that they had spent more time with their family.
May 22nd, 2008 at 10:45 pm
Fine post, Dr. Rob!
Second attempt at commenting here, forgive me if duplicated!
Recent local obits have had two of my childhood girlfriends listed. We were long outta touch, but met smoking in school bathrooms. Think there is a connection? They were too young, that is for sure! I am YOUR age.
Another book suggestion, an odd title and I have mixed feelings about it but have a hunch you might enjoy: David Shields, The thing about life is that one day you’ll be dead.
May 23rd, 2008 at 9:08 am
We all occasionally need the reminder. Thanks
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:25 pm
Well said. Your blog is such a pleasure to read.
June 3rd, 2008 at 6:28 pm
Very well written, and more importantly, sincere. As a fellow Primary care doc- I so identify with your posts. Keep writing.